The Kingdom of Loathing
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Holiday (Historical) Items

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List of Holiday (Historical) Items
All items that could have ever been collected on any holiday

  Item Name
"Humorous" T-shirt
A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 1
A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 2
A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 3
A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 4
A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 5
A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 6
abandoned candy
adhesive tape dolly
all-year sucker
alphabet gum
ammonite candy mold
ammonite fossil
ancient unspeakable fruitcake
Angry Farmer's Wife Candy
arrow'd heart balloon
aspirin
astronaut pants
atomic vector plotter
Ax of L'rose
bacon bath ball
ball
banana supersucker
banana-frosted king cake
bananagate
bananarama bangle
bark beret
bark boxers
bark bracelet
bat-shaped Crimboween cookie
bath ball gift set
battered Crimbo Crate
beet-flavored Mr. Mediocrebar
beholed bedsheet
belemnite candy mold
belemnite fossil
bell-shaped Crimbo cookie
Better Than Cuddling Cake
BGE 'cuddly critter' shirt
BGE 'ferocious fruit' shirt
BGE merchandise order form
BGE pocket calendar
BGE shotglass
BGE temporary tattoo
BGE tiny plastic toy
bi-lateral logic compressor
Big Candy's tophat
bindlestocking
biomechanical crimborg helmet
biomechanical crimborg leg armor
Bit O' Ectoplasm
bit-o-cactus
BittyCar HotCar
BittyCar MeatCar
BittyCar SoulCar
black & tan
black forest cake
black forest ham
black paisley oyster egg
black pepper
black plastic oyster egg
black polka-dot oyster egg
black pudding
black striped oyster egg
black velvet box
Blackfly Chardonnay
blank fudge mold
blind-packed capsule toy
blob-shaped Crimbo cookie
blue glowstick
blue paisley oyster egg
blue plastic baby
blue plastic oyster egg
blue polka-dot oyster egg
blue raspberry troll doll
blue ribbon
blue striped oyster egg
blue traffic cone
blueberry-frosted king cake
bobble-hip hula elf doll
Bodacious MechaElf Hunter Saga:Relay Wolf
borg sock monkey
bottle of Blank-Out
bottle of bubbles
bottle of gin
bottle of peppermint schnapps
bottle of rum
bottle of tequila
bottle of vodka
bottle of whiskey
bouquet of circular saw blades
bow
bow staff
bowlegged pants
bowler
boxed wine
brainwave-controlled unicorn horn
brass crank handle
brick
brown plastic baby
bubble-wrap simulator
buckyball
Bulky Buddy Box
burrowgrub hive
C.B.F.G.
cabbage-flavored Mr. Mediocrebar
can of Binarrrca
can of CRIMBCOLA
can of fake snow
can of franks 'n' beans
can-shaped gelatinous cranberry sauce
candied kobold
candied yams
candy brain
candy cane
candy kneecapping stick
candy knuckles
candy stake
candycaine powder
cane-mail pants
cane-mail shirt
canteen of wine
capacitor relay
carbon nanotube frame
carbonite visor
cement sandals
cheap elven gloves
cheap plastic bottle opener
ChibiBuddy™ (off)
ChibiBuddy™ (on)
children of the candy corn
chitinous pod
chocolate bath ball
chocolate cigar
chocolate filthy lucre
chocolate-covered diamond-studded roses
chocolate-covered scarab beetle
chocolate-frosted king cake
cinnamon troll doll
circular CRIMBCOOKIE
Cloaca grenade
coal paperweight
cog
Cold Hots candy
colored-light "necklace"
computronic processing unit
CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 1)
CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 2)
CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 3)
CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 4)
CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 5)
CRIMBCO lanyard
CRIMBCO mug
CRIMBCO scrip
CRIMBCO wine
CRIMBCOIDS mints
CRIMBCOLOAF
Crimbo bottomless hot cocoa mug
Crimbo candied pecan
Crimbo Candy Cookbook
Crimbo Elf creepy bobble-head
Crimbo fudge
Crimbo hat
Crimbo light-up Rudolph doll
Crimbo pants
Crimbo peppermint bark
Crimbo pressie
Crimbo stocking
Crimbo stogie-scented room odorizer
Crimbo sword
Crimbo tree flocker
Crimbo ukulele
Crimbo wreath
Crimbojito
Crimbomination Contraption
Crimbough
Crimboween memo
Crimbuck
crotchety pants
cyborg doll
cyborg stompin' boot
Daffy Taffy
Deactivated MiniMechaElf
deck of tropical cards
deluxe fax machine
depleted Grimacite kneecapping stick
detour shield
Dickory Farms Gift Basket
doll house
dollhive
double daisy
dubious peppermint
duck-on-a-string
dusty Crimbo crate
dwarf bread
Dyspepsi grenade
eggnog
electrical thingamabob
electronic dulcimer pants
elven limbos gingerbread
elven cellocello
elven moonshine
elven socks
elven suicide capsule
elven whittling knife
Elvish delight
Everlasting Deckswabber
evil googly eye
evil teddy bear
expired bottle of peppermint schnapps
expired can of franks 'n' beans
extra special Crimbo stocking
fake plastic grass
fancy but probably evil chocolate
fancy canapés
fancy chocolate
fancy chocolate car
fancy dress ball
felt
festive holiday hat
festive sausage
Feynman gate
fire
flashing novelty button
fluid of fudge-finding
foie gras
frigid fudgepuck
frostbite-flavored Hob-O
Frown Exerciser
fruitcake
fruitfilm
fry-oil-flavored Hob-O
fudge bunny
fudge cube
fudge lily
fudge pocket square
fudge spork
fudgecule
fudgecycle
fudgesicle
Fudgie Roll
Fuzzby
garbage-juice-flavored Hob-O
General Assembly Module
giant glass of brandy
giant green gummi bear
giant green gummi ingot
giant red gummi bear
giant red gummi ingot
giant yellow gummi bear
giant yellow gummi ingot
gift-a-pult
Gin Mint
gingerbread bugbear
gingerbread horror
gingerbread house
gingerbread mutant bugbear
glob of Blank-Out
glow-in-the-dark dart gun
glow-in-the-dark stuffed burrowgrub
glow-in-the-dark wristwatch
gnashing teeth
Go-Wassail
golden plastic oyster egg
golden ring
Good 'n' Slimy
googly eye
grape troll doll
grass blade
grass hat
grass skirt
gray bow tie
green beer
green drunki-bear
green glowstick
green gummi ingot
green traffic cone
gummi ammonite
gummi belemnite
gummi bowtie
gummi canary
gummi salamander
gummi snake
gummi trilobite
Gummi-DNA
Gummi-Gnauga
gyroscope
handful of Crotchety Pine needles
handful of Laughing Willow bark
Hanukkimbo dreidl
heart of dark chocolate
herb brownies
herbal stuffing
herringcello
hi-density nylocite leg armor
high-resistance ultrapolymer plating
holiday cheese log
holiday log
honey-dipped locust
hyperbolic plasma focuser
iGoogly
imitation nice watch
immense cyborg hand
incense bath ball
incredibly creepy marionette
invisible bag
ion grid
ion-pulse modulation stabilizer
irradiated candy cane
Jack-in-the-box
Jackass Plumber home game
jawbruiser
jerky coins
jingle bell
kevlateflocite helmet
killer rag doll
killing feather
kite
Knob Goblin love potion
Knob Goblin steroids
knuckle sandwich
kumquartz
kumquartz ring
kumquat supersucker
laser cannon
laser targeting chip
laser-broiled pear
lavender paisley oyster egg
lavender plastic oyster egg
lavender polka-dot oyster egg
lavender striped oyster egg
LED block
leftover Crimbo rations
length of string
licorice garrote
licorice root
lime supersucker
lint
live wire
logic synthesizer
lollipop cufflinks
lollipop stick
lucky Crimbo tiki necklace
lump of Saccharine Maple sap
M-242
mad scientist's sock monkey
MagiMechTech NanoMechaMech
maple syrup
marionette
marionette collective
mass of wriggling tentacles
mauve paisley oyster egg
mauve plastic oyster egg
mauve polka-dot oyster egg
mauve striped oyster egg
miniature antlers
miniature stuffed Goth Giant
Miniborg beeper
Miniborg Destroy-O-Bot
Miniborg hiveminder
Miniborg laser
Miniborg stomper
Miniborg strangler
Mint Yulep
misfit dolly
misfit hobby horse
misfit teddy bear
monomolecular yo-yo
motivational poster
moxie weed
Mr. Mediocrebar
mulled cider
mummy costume
mylar scout drone
myrrh-soaked, chocolate-covered bacon bath ball
nanite-infested candy cane
nanite-infested eggnog
nanite-infested fruitcake
nanite-infested gingerbread bugbear
nanofiber cloth
night-vision goggles
Now and Earlier
off-white paisley oyster egg
off-white plastic oyster egg
off-white polka-dot oyster egg
off-white striped oyster egg
oozenog
orange and black Crimboween candy
orange glowstick
orange traffic cone
outrageous sombrero
oversized fish scaler
oyster basket
pack of pogs
packet of tofurkey gravy
pair of bolt cutters
pair of pearidot earrings
pair of ragged claws
pair of twitching claws
paperclip
paperclip cape
paperclip pants
paperclip sproinger
paperclip turban
paperclip-on tie
parasitic claw
parasitic headgnawer
parasitic strangleworm
parasitic tentacles
passable elf mask
patent leather shoes
peanut brittle shield
pear supersucker
pearidot
penguin focaccia bread
penguin thesaurus
pet rock
petrified wood
piece of after eight
pile of loose snow
pink glowstick
pink plastic baby
pirate hook
pixellated candy heart
plastic Crimbo reindeer
plastic ingot
plexifoam chin strap
pocketwatch on a chain
poison pen
polyalloy shield
polymorphic fastening apparatus
portable corkscrew
portable photocopier
possessed top
powdered candy sushi set
prehistoric spear
psycho sweater
puce paisley oyster egg
puce plastic oyster egg
puce polka-dot oyster egg
puce striped oyster egg
pulsing flesh
pumpkinhead mask
purple glowstick
quantum polarity inducer
radioactive chew toy
rag doll
razor-tipped yo-yo
recursive spline reticulator
red drunki-bear
red gummi ingot
red paisley oyster egg
red plastic baby
red plastic oyster egg
red polka-dot oyster egg
Red Rover BB gun
red striped oyster egg
red traffic cone
red-and-green sweater
reverse-oscillating klystron
ribbon candy
rigid carapace
roboduck-on-a-string
robotronic egg
rock
Rock Pops
rogue swarmer
roll of Hob-Os
rxr shield
Saccharine Maple pendant
Sangria de Menthe
sawblade fragment
scissor duck
Senior Mints
servomechanical torsion facilitator
set of Unobtainium straps
shot of grapefruit schnapps
shot of orange schnapps
shot of tomato schnapps
silicon-infused gluteal shield
single-serving herbal stuffing
skull-shaped Crimboween cookie
sleeping snowy owl
sleeping stocking
slippery when wet shield
slow jam collection
small Crimbo Pressie
snake
snow belly
snow halo
snow hat
snow pants
sock monkey
space jam
space jam toast
sparkler
speed limit shield
spooky bark
spooky eggnog
spooky felt
spooky length of string
spooky sap
spooky stuffing
Spooky Surprise Egg
spooky toy wheel
spooky wooden block
spring
sprocket
square CRIMBCOOKIE
St. Sneaky Pete's Day goodies basket
Staff of the Woodfire
stapler bear
Steal This Candy
sterno-flavored Hob-O
stick
stick-on-a-string
stop shield
strawberry supersucker
strawberry-flavored Hob-O
strawberyl
strawberyl necklace
string of blue beads
string of Crimbo lights
string of green beads
string of red beads
stringy sinew
stuffed alien blob
stuffed doppelshifter
stuffed gray blob
stuffed ninja snowman
stuffing
sturdy Crimbo crate
sub-molecular interocitor
sucker bucket
sucker hakama
sucker kabuto
sucker scaffold
sucker tachi
Sugar Cog
sugar-coated pine cone
Super Crimboman Ultra Mega Hypersword
superheated fudge
sweet mochi ball
sweet-corn-flavored Mr. Mediocrebar
synthetic stuffing
Taco Dan's Taco Stand Chillacious Churro
Taco Dan's Taco Stand Chimichangarita
Taco Dan's Taco Stand Flier
Taco Dan's Taco Stand Taco
Tales of a Kansas Toymaker
tasket
Tasty Fun Good rice candy
tattered paper crown
teddy bear
teddy borg
Tequiz Navidad
The Joy of Wassailing
The Spirit of Crimbo
theoretical string
thermos of brew
throbbing rage gland
throwing wrench
Tickle-Me Emilio
Tiki lighter
time sleigh
tin star
tiny plastic 11 Dealer
tiny plastic abominable fudgeman
tiny plastic ancient yuletide troll
tiny plastic animelf
tiny plastic Best Game Ever
tiny plastic Big Candy
tiny plastic ChibiBuddy™
tiny plastic chunk of depleted Grimacite
tiny plastic colollilossus
tiny plastic CRIMBCO HQ
tiny plastic Crimbo Casino
tiny plastic Crimbo elf
tiny plastic Crimbo reindeer
tiny plastic Crimbo wreath
tiny plastic Crimbomination
tiny plastic Crimboween pentagram
tiny plastic Don Crimbo
tiny plastic fat stack of cash
tiny plastic fax machine
tiny plastic Fudge Wizard
tiny plastic gift-wrapping vampire
tiny plastic hobo elf
tiny plastic MechaElf
tiny plastic Mob Penguin
tiny plastic Mr. Mination
tiny plastic mutant elf
tiny plastic Scream Queen
tiny plastic skeletal reindeer
tiny plastic stocking mimic
tiny plastic strand of DNA
tiny plastic sweet nutcracker
tiny plastic sword
tiny plastic taco-clad Crimbo elf
tiny plastic trollipop
tiny plastic Uncle Crimbo
tiny plastic Uncle Crimboku
tisket
toe jam
toe jam toast
tofurkey gravy
tofurkey leg
tofurkey nugget
tomato
tombstone-shaped Crimboween cookie
tooth
toothbrush
toothsome rock
top
tourmalime
tourmalime tourniquet
toy crazy train
toy deathbot
toy hoverpad
toy jet pack
toy maglev monorail
toy mercenary
toy ray gun
toy soldier
toy space helmet
toy train
toy wheel
traffic jam
traffic jam toast
tree skirt
tree-eating kite
tree-shaped Crimbo cookie
triangular CRIMBCOOKIE
trilobite candy mold
trilobite fossil
Trivial Avocations board game
Tropical Crimbo Hat
tropical Crimbo pressie
Tropical Crimbo Shorts
Tropical Crimbo Sword
tropical paperweight
tropical wrapping paper
tube of cranberry Go-Goo
twitching claw
Uncle Crimbo's Rations
Uncle Crimbo's Sack
Uncle Greenspan's Bathroom Finance Guide
Uncle Hobo's belt
Uncle Hobo's epic beard
Uncle Hobo's fingerless tinsel gloves
Uncle Hobo's gift baggy pants
Uncle Hobo's highest bough
Uncle Hobo's stocking cap
Underworld acorn
Underworld flail
Underworld truncheon
Underworld trunk
Unionize The Elves sign
unstable DNA
unstable laser battery
Valentine
Valentine's Day cake
vampire duck-on-a-string
vanilla-frosted king cake
vibrating cyborg knife
vitachoconutriment capsule
Vodka Matryoshka
wad of cotton
wand of fudge control
wheel
willowy bonnet
wind-up meatcar
Wint-O-Fresh mint
witch hat
wolfman mask
Wolfman Nardz
wooden block
Workytime Tea
wrapping paper
wreath-shaped Crimbo cookie
wriggling tentacle
yam candy
yellow drunki-bear
yellow glowstick
yellow gummi ingot
yellow paisley oyster egg
yellow plastic oyster egg
yellow polka-dot oyster egg
yellow striped oyster egg
yellow traffic cone
yield shield
yo
yo-yo
Yummy Tummy bean